Gospel Principles
Unit 8: Family Salvation
Chapter 37: Family Responsibility
Comments and Resources

'President David O. McKay said "When one puts business or pleasure above his home, he that moment starts on the downgrade to soul-weakness.  When the club becomes more attractive to any man than his home, it is time for him to confess in bitter shame that he has failed to measure up to the supreme opportunity of his life and flunked in the final test of true manhood.  No other success can compensate for failure in the home.  The poorest shack in which love prevails over a united family is of greater value to God and future humanity than any other riches.  In such a home God can work miracles and will work miracles."  ("What a Person Does Practically Believe Determines His Character," Improvement Era, June 1964, p. 445; also in Conference Report, Apr, 1964, p. 5).

During the study of this topic, we will learn that each member of the family has certain responsibilities, and you will learn what those responsibilities are.'


Resources
Gospel Principles, chapter 37.

Scriptures:

Topical Guide: <http://Scriptures.lds.org/en/tg/contents> 
               Family, Children, Duties of
               Family, Children, Responsibilities toward                                                   
	       Family 

Bible Dictionary: <http://Scriptures.lds.org/en/bd/contents>			   
                  Family
 

Concept 1: Introduction

'Each person has an important place in his or her family.  Through prophets the Lord has explained how fathers, mothers, and children should behave and feel toward one another.  As husbands, wives, and children we need to learn what the Lord expects us to do to fulfill our purpose as a family.  If we all do our part, we will be able to live together as a family forever.

Discussion

What is the purpose of a family?'


Concept 2: Responsibilities of the Parents

'In marriage neither the man nor the woman is more important than the other.  They are equal partners and should work together to provide for the spiritual, emotional, intellectual, and physical needs of the family.

Some responsibilities must be shared by the husband and the wife.  Parents should teach their children the gospel.  The Lord warned that if parents do not teach their children about faith, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost, the sin will be upon the heads of the parents.  Parents should also teach their children to pray and to obey the Lord's commandments. 
D&C 68:25, 28:
"25. And again, inasmuch as parents have children in Zion, or in any of her stakes which are organized, that teach them not to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of the hands, when eight years old, the sin be upon the heads of the parents."
"28. And they shall also teach their children to pray, and to walk uprightly before the Lord."

One of the best ways parents can teach their children is by example.  Husbands and wives should show love and respect for each other and for their children by both actions and words.  It is important to remember that each member of the family is a child of God.  Parents should treat their children with love and respect, being firm but kind to them.

Parents should understand that sometimes children will make wrong choices even after they have been taught the truth.  When this happens, parents should not give up or become discouraged.  They should continue to teach their children, to express love for them, to be good examples to them, and to fast and pray for them.

The Book of Mormon tells us how the prayers of a father helped a rebellious son return to the ways of the Lord.  Alma the Younger had fallen away from the teachings of his righteous father, Alma, and had gone about seeking to destroy the Church.  The father prayed with faith for his son.  Alma the Younger was visited by an angel and repented of his evil way of living.  He became a great leader of the Church. 
(Mosiah 27:8-32.)
"8. Now the sons of Mosiah were numbered among the unbelievers; and also one of the sons of Alma was numbered among them, he being called Alma, after his father; nevertheless, he became a very wicked and an idolatrous man.  And he was a man of many words, and did speak much flattery to the people; therefore he led many of the people to do after the manner of his iniquities.
 9. And he became a great hinderment to the prosperity of the church of God; stealing away the hearts of the people; causing much dissension among the people; giving a chance for the enemy of God to exercise his power over them.
 10. And now it came to pass that while he was going about to destroy the church of God, for he did go about secretly with the sons of Mosiah seeking to destroy the church, and to lead astray the people of the Lord, contrary to the commandments of God, or even the king--
 11. And as I said unto you, as they were going about rebelling against God, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto them; and he descended as it were in a cloud; and he spake as it were with a voice of thunder, which caused the earth to shake upon which they stood;
 12. And so great was their astonishment, that they fell to the earth, and understood not the words which he spake unto them.
 13. Nevertheless he cried again, saying: Alma, arise and stand forth, for why persecutest thou the church of God?  For the Lord hath said: This is my church, and I will establish it; and nothing shall overthrow it, save it is the transgression of my people.
 14. And again, the angel said: Behold, the Lord hath heard the prayers of his people, and also the prayers of his servant, Alma, who is thy father; for he has prayed with much faith concerning thee that thou mightest be brought to the knowledge of the truth; therefore, for this purpose have I come to convince thee of the power and authority of God, that the prayers of his servants might be answered according to their faith.
 15. And now behold, can ye dispute the power of God?  For behold, doth not my voice shake the earth?  And can ye not also behold me before you?  And I am sent from God.
 16. Now I say unto thee: Go, and remember the captivity of thy fathers in the land of Helam, and in the land of Nephi; and remember how great things he has done for them; for they were in bondage, and he has delivered them.  And now I say unto thee, Alma, go thy way, and seek to destroy the church no more, that their prayers may be answered, and this even if thou wilt of thyself be cast off.
 17. And now it came to pass that these were the last words which the angel spake unto Alma, and he departed.
 18. And now Alma and those that were with him fell again to the earth, for great was their astonishment; for with their own eyes they had beheld an angel of the Lord; and his voice was as thunder, which shook the earth; and they knew that there was nothing save the power of God that could shake the earth and cause it to tremble as though it would part asunder.
 19. And now the astonishment of Alma was so great that he became dumb, that he could not open his mouth; yea, and he became weak, even that he could not move his hands; therefore he was taken by those that were with him, and carried helpless, even until he was laid before his father.
 20. And they rehearsed unto his father all that had happened unto them; and his father rejoiced, for he knew that it was the power of God.
 21. And he caused that a multitude should be gathered together that they might witness what the Lord had done for his son, and also for those that were with him.
 22. And he caused that the priests should assemble themselves together; and they began to fast, and to pray to the Lord their God that he would open the mouth of Alma, that he might speak, and also that his limbs might receive their strength--that the eyes of the people might be opened to see and know of the goodness and glory of God.
 23. And it came to pass after they had fasted and prayed for the space of two days and two nights, the limbs of Alma received their strength, and he stood up and began to speak unto them, bidding them to be of good comfort:
 24. For, said he, I have repented of my sins, and have been redeemed of the Lord; behold I am born of the Spirit.
 25. And the Lord said unto me: Marvel not that all mankind, yea, men and women, all nations, kindreds, tongues and people, must be born again; yea, born of God, changed from their carnal and fallen state, to a state of righteousness, being redeemed of God, becoming his sons and daughters;
 26. And thus they become new creatures; and unless they do this, they can in nowise inherit the kingdom of God.
 27. I say unto you, unless this be the case, they must be cast off; and this I know, because I was like to be cast off.
 28. Nevertheless, after wading through much tribulation, repenting nigh unto death, the Lord in mercy hath seen fit to snatch me out of an everlasting burning, and I am born of God.
 29. My soul hath been redeemed from the gall of bitterness and bonds of iniquity.  I was in the darkest abyss; but now I behold the marvelous light of God.  My soul was racked with eternal torment; but I am snatched, and my soul is pained no more.
 30. I rejected my Redeemer, and denied that which had been spoken of by our fathers; but now that they may foresee that he will come, and that he remembereth every creature of his creating, he will make himself manifest unto all.
 31. Yea, every knee shall bow, and every tongue confess before him.  Yea, even at the last day, when all men shall stand to be judged of him, then shall they confess that he is God; then shall they confess, who live without God in the world, that the judgment of an everlasting punishment is just upon them; and they shall quake, and tremble, and shrink beneath the glance of his all-searching eye.
 32. And now it came to pass that Alma began from this time forward to teach the people, and those who were with Alma at the time the angel appeared unto them, traveling round about through all the land, publishing to all the people the things which they had heard and seen, and preaching the word of God in much tribulation, being greatly persecuted by those who were unbelievers, being smitten by many of them."

Parents can provide an atmosphere of reverence and respect in the home if they teach and guide their children with love. Parents should also provide happy experiences for their children.

Discussion

Discuss the responsibilities of the parents.'



Concept 3: Responsibilities of the Father

'The father is the patriarch of the family and has important responsibilities that are his alone.  He is the priesthood holder and has the duties of priesthood leadership.  He should guide his family with humility and kindness rather than with force or cruelty.  The Scriptures  teach that those who hold the priesthood should lead others by persuasion, gentleness, love, and kindness.
D&C 121:41-44; 
"41. No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;
 42. By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile--
 43. Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;
 44. That he may know that thy faithfulness is stronger than the cords of death."

Ephesians 6:4; "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." 

The father shares the blessings of the priesthood with the members of his family.  When a man holds the Melchizedek Priesthood, he can share these blessings by naming and blessing babies, administering to the sick, baptizing children, and giving special priesthood blessings and ordinations.  He should set a good example for his family by keeping the commandments.  He should also make sure the family prays together twice daily and holds family home evening.

The father should spend time with each child individually.  He should teach his children correct principles, talk with them about their problems and concerns, and counsel them lovingly.  Some good examples are found in the Book of Mormon (see 2 Nephi 1:14-3:25; Alma 36-42).



It is also the father's duty to provide for the physical needs of his family, making sure they have the necessary food, housing, clothing, and education.  Even if he is unable to provide all the support himself, he does not give up the responsibility of the care of his family.'



Concept 4: Responsibilities of the Mother

'President David O. McKay said that motherhood is woman's noblest calling (see Treasures of Life, p. 54).  It is a sacred calling, a partnership with God in bringing his spirit children into the world.  A mother's most important responsibility is to bring children into the world and to care for and teach them.  Bearing children is one of the greatest of all blessings.

Elder Boyd K. Packer praised women who were unable to have children of their own yet sought to care for others.  He said: "When I speak of mothers, I speak not only of those women who have borne children, but also of those who have fostered children born to others, and of the many women who, without children of their own, have mothered the children of others" (Mothers, p. 8).

A mother needs to spend time with her children and teach them the gospel.  She should play and work with them so they can discover the world around them.  She also needs to help her family know how to make the home a pleasant place to be.  If she is warm and loving, she helps her children feel good about themselves.

The Book of Mormon describes a group of two thousand young men who rose to greatness because of the teachings of their mothers.  Alma 53:16-23: 
 "16. But behold, it came to pass they had many sons, who had not entered into a covenant that they would not take their weapons of war to defend themselves against their enemies; therefore they did assemble themselves together at this time, as many as were able to take up arms, and they called themselves Nephites.
 17. And they entered into a covenant to fight for the liberty of the Nephites, yea, to protect the land unto the laying down of their lives; yea, even they covenanted that they never would give up their liberty, but they would fight in all cases to protect the Nephites and themselves from bondage.
 18. Now behold, there were two thousand of those young men, who entered into this covenant and took their weapons of war to defend their country.
 19. And now behold, as they never had hitherto been a disadvantage to the Nephites, they became now at this period of time also a great support; for they took their weapons of war, and they would that Helaman should be their leader.
 20. And they were all young men, and they were exceedingly valiant for courage, and also for strength and activity; but behold, this was not all--they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted.
 21. Yea, they were men of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him.
 22. And now it came to pass that Helaman did march at the head of his two thousand stripling soldiers, to the support of the people in the borders of the land on the south by the west sea.
 23. And thus ended the twenty and eighth year of the reign of the judges over the people of Nephi."

Led by the prophet Helaman, they went into battle against their enemies.  They had learned to be honest, brave, and trustworthy from their mothers. Their mothers also taught them that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them; Alma 56:47 "Now they never had fought, yet they did not fear death; and they did think more upon the liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives; yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them."

They all survived the battle.  Later they expressed faith in the teachings of their mothers, saying, "We do not doubt our mothers knew it" (Alma 56:48).  Every mother who has a testimony can have a profound effect on her children.

Discussion

Why is motherhood called a partnership with God?'


Concept 5: Responsibilities of the Children

'Children share with their parents the responsibilities of building a happy home.  They should obey the commandments and cooperate with other family members.  The Lord is not pleased when children quarrel.  Mosiah 4:14 "And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness."

The Lord has commanded children to honor their parents.  He said, "Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land" (Exodus 20:12).  To honor parents means to love and respect them.  It also means to obey them.  The Scriptures  tell children to "obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right" (Ephesians 6:1).

President Spencer W. Kimball said that children should learn to work and to share responsibilities in the home and yard.  They should be given assignments to keep the house neat and clean.  Children may also be given assignments to take care of the garden (see Conference Report, Apr. 1976, p. 5; or Ensign, May 1976, p. 5).

Discussion

What should children do to honor and respect their parents?'



Concept 6: Accepting Responsibilities Brings Blessings

'A loving and happy family does not happen by accident.  Each person in the family must do his or her part. The Lord has given responsibilities to both parents and children.  The Scriptures  teach that we must be thoughtful, cheerful, and considerate of others.  When we speak, pray, sing, or work together, we can enjoy the blessings of harmony in our families. (See Colossians 3.)

" 1. If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 
  2. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. 
  3. For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. 
  4. When Christ, [who is] our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory. 
  5. Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: 
  6. For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience: 
  7. In the which ye also walked some time, when ye lived in them. 
  8. But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth. 
  9. Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds; 
 10. And have put on the new [man], which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him: 
 11. Where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond [nor] free: but Christ [is] all, and in all. 
 12. Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; 
 13. Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also [do] ye. 
 14. And above all these things [put on] charity, which is the bond of perfectness. 
 15. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful. 
 16. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. 
 17. And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, [do] all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. 
 18. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 
 19. Husbands, love [your] wives, and be not bitter against them. 
 20. Children, obey [your] parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. 
 21. Fathers, provoke not your children [to anger], lest they be discouraged. 
 22. Servants, obey in all things [your] masters according to the flesh; not with eye service, as men pleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God: 
 23. And whatsoever ye do, do [it] heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; 
 24. Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. 
 25. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons."

Discussion

How can we help make home a happier place?

Additional Scriptures 

Proverbs 22:6 (train up a child) 
 6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. 

Ephesians 6:1-3 (children are to obey parents)' <http://Scriptures.lds.org/en/eph/6>
  1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. 
  2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) 
  3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. 


-----------------
Moroni 10:4-5
"4. And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. 
5. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things."

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